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BREAKING NEWS: Dog Files Mascot, Max Promoted To Rudolph's Position For Tonight's Sleigh Ride!

North Pole, Earth — The word coming from sources within Santa’s Workshop is that Rudolph’s long running tinsel addiction has flared up once again.

The Red Nosed Reindeer has been moved to a secret location where he will be staying under the supervision of staff at the Betty Ford rehabilitation clinic. Our sources tell us that he has signed a six figure deal to star in next season’s, Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew on the E! Network.

“Tinsel addiction is at its worst during the holiday season,” says Dr. Drew, “and it’s always been a problem issue with people from the North Pole. But I really think we’ll be able to make a difference by putting a spotlight on it with our show.”

The North Pole Maritime Association held a press conference today where a jolly elf dressed in red announced that Max, the Dog Files Mascot has been tapped to take Rudolph’s position tonight, should the weather around the world get any worse.

“We here at the North Pole couldn’t be more proud to add Max to the roster and we believe great things are in store for him tonight,” confirmed the chubby elf.

When asked by a member of the media if Max not having a red nose would hamper the sleigh ride, the jolly elf chimed in, “Did you happen to see the size of Max’s schnozz? No red nose needed here. Ho, ho, ho!”

Back in New Jersey where Max is awaiting pick up, he has confirmed that his antlers were delivered this morning by a group of tiny men dressed in green and red.

Max was surprised to see that the “antlers” were made of felt. Said one of the tiny folks, “Times are tough at the North Pole too!”

When asked for a comment, Max, the Dog Files Mascot said, “I’m in the best shape of my life and I’m ready to give my all to the team to make sure the world’s children get all their presents! But when it’s over, I’d advise Santa to put all the deer away quick because I love to chase them. Hey, what can I say, I’m a hound.”

Stay turned for more, late breaking details!

Seen in this AP/Newswire photo, Max, the Dog Files Mascot puts his game face on as he continually checks the ever-evolving weather patterns.
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9 years ago

MAX is adorable and I’m sure he will fill the bill perfectly!! MERRY CHRISTMAS MAX!!

8 years ago

WAY TO GO MAX !!!    Santa couldn’t ask for a better ” Reindeer”  stand-in than  MAX !    Just look at that fierce determination on his  face.   He makes  antlers (even if they are felt)  look GOOD !  Besides,  you gotta go with comfort when ever you can,  after all,  it will be a long sleigh ride  around the world.   May I suggest further that  REMY  ” suit” up and  “antler” up , and go along  as “Reindeer”  substitute relief.  They make such a great team already.   My canine crew  Rudy & Cluey, along with  feline sibling Inky, totally approve of this last minute arrangement !!   Who needs reindeer when you have the Dog Files  DYNAMIC DUO  on the job !!  Make us proud !!  We will await your arrival at our house Christmas Eve,  with  Milk-Bone treats.   Further,  if you need some help with the real reindeer,  Cluey, my beagle-girl LOVES  a good chase, LOL !  MERRY CHRISTMAS  DOG  FILES !      [email protected]                            

8 years ago

We will be waiting for you max!!!

8 years ago



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